Seven's moved in with us, since her apartment was destroyed in a freak bomb attack... Freak as in (to coin a Paris term), I freaked! Someone wanted to kill Seven, because of who she is. Short sighted blind men who should be punished in the hardest way possible.

We're in Bloomington, so Mom visits, and we visit her. I think she likes Seven.

Which puts my mind at ease.

'What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.' Do you agree or disagree? Why?

I agree.

If I can explain my answer is a different matter. I just know it's something I can agree with. She paused, as if trying to create a sensible answer. I should have been killed on a planet in the Tau Ceti system. Ever since then I couldn't die from crashing a shuttle. My body doesn't go rigid... It floats.

I make it float on a thousand star kissed tears. I'm a soul in a dormant vessel until I feel earth beneath my feet.

Torture doesn't work well either. Cardassians saw to that. They break the spirit, try to control your soul as they try to control your body.

I floated then. I dreamt of puppies and ice-cream and super novae as each blow descended. She placed her hand softly on her abdomen. I hope she... maybe he, hopefully she, will never have to go through my trauma. I don't want a child, my child, broken by xenophobic aliens afraid of their shadows, or shattered almost to a thousand crysteline pieces by broken ships. I want her safe.

I hope what's made me strong makes her stronger.


Character: Kathryn Janeway
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Word count: 188

"If..." (Complete the sentence and write your ficlette. Your ficlette must begin with this sentence.)

"If I could give you the world, I’d give you everything, and every star shall be your nightlight, the sun your guardian angel as you play each day with every kid on the school yard. You shall not want for anything, as we will give you everything. All that is mine shall be yours, as you are my precious angel.

"If I could paint you a picture of life before you, it would be grey, as you bring colour to my life, the colours that were as vibrant as planets beneath the brow of my ship are shamed by the light you bring to my life. The roses would be like weeds in my garden without you here.

"I’ve not felt you yet, but I know that you’ll love me as I love you. You’re so special little one, a little miracle for your father and I, and we can’t wait for the day you arrive.

-- Your mother xxx"


Character: Kathryn Janeway
Fandom: Star Trek Voyager
Word count: 160

One: Not having coffee in the morning... Or at mid morning break, or whilst I write reports for various people. I can't have coffee with lunch, or my mid afternoon pick-me-up (which consisted solely of coffee). My body has rebelled with this pregnancy, and because of that, I have to drink, Kathryn forced back a grimace, tea. My body has said, 'No, no more caffeine! The poor cells can't take anymore. We surrendered years ago to this poison and we're not sure if your blood is actually blood anymore, but coffee.' She coughed. Starting to go mad, not good.

Two: Alynna Nechayev. She’s an admiral who thinks the sun shines from her behind. She’s been sending communiqués these past few days, wanting a meet about something, not telling me exactly what about, and she just expects me to jump at her command! Kathryn snorted in an undignified, un-admiral like way. No longer am I a circus animal to these admirals. Especially her, Miss ‘I was an admiral before you so I’m going to make your life misery’ Nechayev.

Three: Chakotay’s constant stream of, ‘Be careful!’ whenever I get up to do something. It’s almost as if he's forgotten that I was a Starfleet captain in an uncharted part of the universe! She growled, almost Klingon like. I'm pregnant, not a glass unicorn.

...

Did I mention Alynna?


Character: Kathryn Janeway
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Word Count: 227

Write about mother (your own or someone else's).

My mom is a wonderful, fascinating woman. She can knit, cook, do maths and still find time to play matchmaker in my town. She's warm, but not afraid to give you a piece of her mind (even if you are a Starfleet admiral with time on your hands). She's been a pillar of strength for me since my father died. She keeps the Janeway traditions. Every year she'll place red tulips and white roses at his grave. She's the strongest woman I know.

Kathryn rubbed her arms then her abdomen. My mom has given me strength these past few months. I would visit her when Chakotay was away, and I felt like a child again, protected from everything.

She knew from that first bout of morning sickness that I was pregnant, but didn't bother to tell me. She let me find out for myself. That's what I love about her; she lets you be your own person... I hope I can be like that for my child.

--
Character: Kathryn Janeway
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Word count: 167 (including italics)

Kathryn rubbed her hands over her belly, a slight mannerism of possessive protection that she needed for herself and her unborn child. I'm pregnant. The Doctor checked me out a few months ago, and when Chakotay found out we were off on an extended holiday, regardless of if I wanted to work or not. He's been a bit protective of me, bundling me up on cold cold days, and putting liters of sunscreen on me on the sunny days. If I wasn't so in love with him I would have punched him.

That's where I've been for the past month or so. Relaxing, eating, throwing up. The throwing up isn't as bad as Mom made out to be, but it's still slightly... off-putting, starting my day with my head in the toilet. Oh well, it'll be over soon. Mom and Phoebe's morning sickness ended around the start of the second trimester, so hopefully it'll be the same for me.

I spoke to Neelix about two weeks ago. He's doing well, and he congratulated me and Chakotay. He didn't know how much that meant to me. She smiled.

Harry's doing well on Voyager. Their new captain (as Chakotay has retired) isn't as understanding of the Delta Quadrant people, but it's to be expected. They don't know the crew as well as Chakotay or myself.

I need to sleep. I've been tired recently, from the pregnancy. I've slept more this past month than I have in the past seven years!

My mom would always say 'Pride goeth before a fall.' "Those who are arrogant are gonna fail Katie dear." When she first told me that, I had no idea what she meant.

Then I met the Cardassians.

They were so sure of their ways, so arrogant. They thought they knew everything.

I'm glad the Federation... put them in their place, so to speak. They deserved it.

Ugh, that's the fifth time this week I woke up with the urge to throw up. I have no idea what's wrong with me... I think I better go see the Doctor. I'll do it next week because guess who's coming back!? Kathryn grinned as she recorded her log. Chakotay is coming back, and he's not going away again. He's going to teach in the Academy.

...

Chakotay's coming home.

Kathryn sat gently on the chair, her stomach still queasy after her bout of throwing up earlier that day. Her head span slightly, her legs a bit weak. She felt as if she had been fifteen rounds with B'Elanna and lost. My inspiration is ... it's quite silly, but it's Chakotay. He inspires me to be the best I can be. He makes sure I don't get too... angry, and that I don't starve. Tears started forming. Kathryn missed him dearly, and wished he was there with her. Maybe he'd know what's wrong with me.

Lanna inspires me too. She's just had Ben, and she's doing so much, and I feel a bit... inadequate. I'm hardly here now, and -- Kathryn felt her stomach turn over, and a strange desire for cheese and jelly sandwiches came over her.

---

Kathryn sat down, sandwich in hand, her taste buds satisfied.

Sincerity can be faked... I found out that if I wanted to get out of apologising something to Phoebe all I had to do was fake it. I'd droop my head and my eyes, and say quietly that I was sorry.

...

Sure, Mom caught onto me when I was about fourteen, but in the years before that it worked. Now I've come to realise that I don't want to fake sincerity. I want to be sincere. And I am. When I say that someone looks nice in a dress, I mean it.

Likewise, when the Borg Queen was being bee-like, I would be sincere with her. I'd tell her the truth.

Kathryn licked her lips. You know, cheese and jelly sandwiches taste quite nice. Like apples and cheese. It's the sweet thing with the tang of the savoury. I suggest that everyone tries it.

She sighed. Of course, breakfast tomorrow will be thrown up... I'm sure I've caught a bug. I'll just let it work it's course.

-- Kathryn

My father... He was my biggest inspiration. He was an admiral in Starfleet, designing ships. He was one of the best. All I wanted to do was to make him happy. I would study constantly to make him praise me, and for him to call me his Goldenbird.

When I was about... Hm, four? Maybe five... Well, by then I was learning my multiplication tables, and he asked me what seven times ten was, and nine times ten… Then he threw me a curve ball of sorts, and asked me what twelve times ten was. I was stumped. I only learnt up to ten, and my mind was reeling, thinking how unfair he was for asking that. But I had a moment of clarity. I just imagined our lion fish in rows of ten, and it all made sense. Numbers were fun, and my father helped me see that. He would push me, constantly push me, and he’d let me make my own mistakes.

But when Starfleet started... "talking" with the Cardassians, Daddy would be away more. The tank of lion fish he had in the office went one day to be replaced by a computer terminal, his work days were longer, and family matters seemed like trivial things.

He would be there for some of the holidays. I was grounded when he caught Mark and I swimming in the underground mines of Mars. He was so angry, but all I could think was how could he punish me if all he did was stay away from home. I almost felt as if he had no right to punish me.

He missed helping me move into the Academy. He missed my graduation…

I make him sound like a terrible father. He wasn’t. The night he and the family met Justin was lovely. Daddy was there, not just in body, but his mind was there too. I think it helped that two Starfleet officers were there... Well, we had a slight argument, and I ended up saying how I felt about him being away so much (it must be an eldest daughter thing, Phoebe never missed him as much as I did... I think she was closer to mom) and how he wasn’t proud of me. We talked, longer than we had for years...

... And three days later he was dead. Drowned in ice cold water on a distant planet. He wasn’t supposed to die like that.

My father was an amazing man, and I miss him... Only sometimes, but I do.


Character: Kathryn Janeway
Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager
Words: 422